Thursday, November 1, 2012

Pumpkins

The truth about carving pumpkins is very simple, I enjoyed it much more when I was a child, carving with my dad.  You see, he did all the hard stuff.  He cut the top open, scrapped the inside and did any of the hard carving.  I got to simply reach my hands into the gooey pumpkin guts, draw the face and watch as "my" pumpkin was carved.

Tonight I carved my own pumpkin, all by myself - and it really wasn't as fun or magical as I remembered.

I wonder how many things in life will be this way - so much fun in theory, but just not that good in reality.  It was a bit of a let down, but also reminded me how much I appreciate my father and the people who help make my life full.  It reminded me that things are not magical, it is the people, the interactions that create magic.  It made me appreciate the people who take time to care for me, to check on me, to make me smile, laugh.  Life really isn't always that wonderful - people are often mean, selfish, sometimes things don't work out.  But every once in a while there are people who are wonderful - who stay when they shouldn't, who care when no one else does, who make you laugh when everything seems to be falling apart and remind you to see the good. There are people who look at you when you are sick, tired, ugly or worn and see you as beautiful - who see past your face and to your soul.  They lift you up when you can't even see anything good, especially in yourself.  These people are worth more then pure gold, the people who love you when they shouldn't and see the good in you even when it is hard to find - these people, these people are one in a million.  I am so thankful for the people who love me even when I don't deserve it.

I guess sometimes it takes a disappointment to remind you to appreciate the good times, the good people and the good you have.

And you know what - carving that pumpkin wasn't magical, I didn't create a masterpiece and it didn't measure up to my memory -- but finishing it, was fulfilling.  I did it.  Life isn't always wonderful, isn't always easy, but I am realizing I can do the hard stuff.  I don't have to always like where I am or the way things turn out - but getting through the hard stuff - is possible - and maybe, just maybe the hard stuff is just a step to the next good thing - who really knows.