Part of me thinks it would look glutinous. Selfish. But what if we did it in a way that was totally selfless? A way of spending our lives doing what we loved--using to the fullest the talents God has given us--and throwing out all the other stuff. Pouring ourselves out of expectations, status, comfort zones, throwing out suppose-to's and should do's? What would that look like?
Im not quite sure. I am not sure what this would look like, what it would feel like. I don't know if it would be good. If it would work--what would my life look like if I did this? Im trying think. Im trying to push and challenge and stretch and examine all the things I am supposed to be doing and see if they are worth following. I have the bubbling developing feeling--and today. In this moment I just want to throw away all the should do's and suppose to's. But thats scary. It means excepting the option of failing. Of not having. Of not being all that maybe I can be or should be. Of messing up.
After all this is my life. Only I get to live it. and I only get to live it once. So what does all of this mean for me? WHat is my next step? Truth is I don't know. But I know I want to be something more then the worlds telling me I "should be". I want to do more then I am "supposed" to, I want to shake it up, break it up, and mix it up, more then I "should".
(images from deviantart.com)