Writers Block.

Jehanna is much better at this update thing. I glanced at her blog and realized that she has posted much more then me. Oh well. So much has happened since my last blog. So much has changed. I have changed. It was just last week that I had my 1 year anniversary, that Tuli left, that we picked up baby Amber. But those events feel like they happened months ago.
I have a Calendar taped to the door behind my bad, everyday I jot down what has happened. And last Friday was Wonderful:

Today was a relaxing day: Art in the morning errands in the afternoon and housekeeping in-between. Once of my goals for today was to prepare. Prepare for my trip South, prepare for organization, and to prepare for Sabbath. This I did.

Art Cleaned up? : check
All Laundry done? : check
Room clean? : check
Emails written? : check
Attitude…Good? :

Dirt. Sweat. Bangladesh smells. Hot. Sticky. It was finally my turn to get into the shower. Here I always seem to feel dirty. Even when I know Im clean. I closed the door and flipped on the light. I’m so ready to FEEL clean. The showers are always cold here, but tonight I was craving a warm shower. Its funny the things you miss over here…! As I tiptoed across the slippery floor, I could feel the cold water under foot. Left over water pooled on the ground from the last person’s shower. I silently wished for hot water. I turned on the “water heater” and stepped under the water. Anticipating warmth. I was hit with Ice. The cold water was enough to make me jump. So much for the water heater…Oh well. I just kept thinking. Just get clean. I reached for my yummy smelling body wash…(So glad I brought some from America) and stepped back into the frigid water. But I was pleasantly surprised, the water was luke warm. Slowly the water started to heat up. By the end my shower I almost felt as if I was in America. Enjoying a truly HOT shower. It was wonderful. I FELT truly clean. All my clothes washed. Room clean. I am clean. I am prepared for the Sabbath.
I step out of the shower and walk past the steam covered mirror. I laugh to myself as I realize this is the first time I have seen a steamy mirror after a shower in Bangladesh. Steamy mirrors used to be such an annoyance to me, but today I saw them differently. Today I had the urge to run over and doodle in the steam filled mirror. I did. Then wiped it clean. A smile glued to my face. Nothing could make this day better.
As I stepped into our Air Conditioned room, a rush of cool air and Jehanna’s beaming face were waiting for me. “Elle, we got a package” My heart leapt. A package? How? What? When? I followed her pointing finger to my bed and saw the envelope. We got a package from WWU. I was shocked at how excited I was to get a SM new letter, the school newspaper, and a birthday card from people I do not really know. But it was wonderful. I have never read a Collegian so closely, looked at the WWU calendar more carefully then I did this day.

What a wonderful way to enter into Sabbath. Sometimes I miss home so much the reflection of what I am doing here is hazy and covered with steam. But sometime, sometimes I get the strength to doodle to make something good out of something I usually count as bad; to allow God to wipe my reflection clean, and I realize this is were I am supposed to be. This is what I am supposed to be doing right now. That I am learning so much, and God is so good. Whatever is steaming up your reflection. Whatever is clouding your judgment. I hope we have the strength to doodle in it, make something good out of something bad: and let God wipe us clean.